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Dysregulation in children: how to spot it and help with focused activity

Updated: Apr 11

As a parent or caregiver, you’ve likely noticed those moments when your child is a bit off—maybe they’re super wiggly, upset, or just not tuning in—especially when you’re hoping to work on speech and language.


This is dysregulation, when their nervous system gets a little out of sync. At Talkative Tots, we understand how challenging it can be to practice communication when your little one’s not quite ready. That’s where a “focused activity” comes in—it’s a gentle way to help them settle down. Let’s look at what dysregulation is and how focused activities can get your child ready for speech and language fun.


What is dysregulation in kids?


Dysregulation happens when a child’s emotions or senses get overwhelmed, tipping them off balance. It’s not about being naughty—it’s their way of saying they need a moment to reset. Things like loud sounds, tiredness, or the effort of talking can spark it, especially for kids working on speech and language.


What does dysregulation look like?


Here’s what you might see:


  • Lots of energy: squirming, giggling like crazy, or zooming around.

  • Big emotions: crying, yelling, or frustration that feels extra big.

  • Pulling back: going silent, avoiding you, or staring off.

  • Wandering focus: ignoring you, switching toys fast, or drifting away.


When your child’s in one of these spots, speech and language practice might not click. A focused activity can bring them back to a good place.


Using focused activity to help your child


A focused activity is a quick, engaging task that gives your child something specific to focus on, helping their mind and body settle. Here are some distinct ways to use them at home before speech and language play:


  • Move with purpose

    • If they’re bursting with energy, have them toss a soft ball into a basket five times. It channels their wiggles into something steady.

  • Soothe with touch

    • Let them squeeze a squishy toy while you count to ten. It’s a simple way to ground them without words.

  • Warm up with words

    • Point to two favorite toys and name them together—like “bear” and “car.” It’s an easy bridge to speech practice.

  • Connect through fun

    • If they’re upset or distracted, line up their favorite cars and say “vroom” for each one. It’s playful and pulls them back in.


No pressure—if they’re not ready, take a break and try again later. A little cheer like “you’re doing great!” keeps it positive.


Why focused activity helps


Dysregulation is just your child’s way of showing they need a little support. A focused activity is like a friendly nudge, helping them feel steady so they can shine in speech and language moments. We’re here to cheer you on as you find what works for your little one. Give these a go!

 
 
 

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Image by Kimberly Farmer

Talkative Tots is a platform where you can learn evidence-based information and proven strategies to help encourage and improve your child’s speech language and social skills. 

Disclaimer :
Talkative Tots is not intended to treat or diagnose any speech-language issues or serve as a speech therapy session or replacement for a speech therapy session.

 

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